Poor Choice of Weaponry
“Marium Varinauskas, 28, tried to strike the officer on the head with his penis when she was called out to his flat, but she got out of the way.”
-via the BBC
Watermelon Cat
Ripped from the headlines
I'm terrible. I just couldn't help myself. I saw story over at Boing Boing, saw the pictures, and then read the article and the Photoshop Demon started whispering in my ear. Two more on the flipside.
Shakespeare, Pulp Fiction Style
Inspired by this incredibly funny bit of writing I flipped the script and give to you, without further ado, a scene from Hamlet as done ala Tarantino:
GRAVEYARD SCENE. Enter HAMLET and HORATIO
HAMLET: This skull is motherfuckin Yorrick's. I knew this motherfucker. [picks up skull] First guy to crack a joke, and a good one. And now? Look at this shit. He's a fucking skull. It makes me want to throw up. Right here man he had lips and cheeks and shit. Where are you're motherfucking jokes now, man? Your righteous rhymes? The ones that had all the brothers in stitches. See, he's a skull now man. He can't tell any jokes. He's just a motherfucking skull. Damn shame. Tell me Horatio, one thing...
HORATIO: Anything man. What is it?
HAMLET: Do you think that Greek guy, the old one, Alexander. You think he's just a motherfuckin' skull in the earth now?
HORATIO: Damn straight he is.
HAMLET: You think he smells like shit? [puts down skull]
HORATIO: Damn fucking straight.
HAMLET: We all turn to shit, eh? I can't even imagine trying to find all the rotted pieces of that Alexander dude now. Bits of him must be fucking everywhere. You couldn't even put enough of him together to hole up your ass after a meal at Taco Bell.
HORATIO: You trippin' man. You Are Trippin'.
